The Encounter that Cost Me the Zoo

This is the story of an encounter with Pam Paterson in September of 2021 that she misrepresented to the zoo administration people and which ultimately led to my ban from the zoo, which stands at exactly 30 months (and counting) as I write this. 

I’m not sure of the exact date; all I know is that I quit on September 23, 2021 so it was a few days before that. Kanzi had been going through some bad stereotypie behaviours in recent weeks and we were all very worried about her. She had been off exhibit for a short time, due to her tendency to bite at her rear flank causing open wounds there. As I hadn’t see her in a while, and as I knew there was an observation shift that day so she’d be on exhibit, I ventured up to the hyena enclosure to see how she was doing. When I got there, I stood quite a way back from the window to just observe he without exciting her too much. 

This is probably a good place to make clear that I never at any time made her run back and forth as others did (volunteers and guests alike) because I felt that this was just teasing her. My interactions were always, always of a calming nature and I let Kanzi dictate the terms at every instance. This day was no different.

The first thing I noticed was that there was a rope (I think; a barrier of some kind, at least) across the window at the south end of the exhibit. This was where I first saw Pam Paterson, in uniform, watching the visitors like a hawk. I saw her more than once cross over that barrier in order to (I imagine) get a better view of people at the other window. I thought this was bad form at the time as I don’t think a uniformed zoo person should be giving the impression that the barrier did not need to be obeyed and, in fact, attended an orientation session discussing this exact scenario. But I didn’t say anything to her, as I do not feel it is my place to call out a peer. This will become an important point shortly. 

The next thing I saw was a group of children who were participating in a day camp (as it was September, I imagine it might have been a PA Day), standing by the fence at the northeastern part of the exhibit. These children were accompanied by at least two counsellors and all of them (including the staffers) were calling out to Kanzi loudly, trying to get her attention and draw her down to them. That was precisely what we had been asked not to do: to deliberately try to get her attention or wind her up in any way. I believe Pam is hard of hearing so it’s possible she didn’t hear them from where she had positioned herself; however, it would have been impossible for her not to have noticed them waving and jumping up and down. In any event, she made no effort to stop this group from their aggressive activities. Eventually they moved on and it grew more peaceful at the exhibit. I was still standing away from the glass, talking to another volunteer (Nancy) who was working at the Hyena Wayfinder position. She observed everything I am telling you about that day.

Inevitably, however, Kanzi eventually realized I was there; whether by sight or scent or both, I really don’t know, but she locked eyes with me and immediately headed to the small gap between the fence and window at the south end of the eastern viewing place. She began her usual low growl (sounds very much like a purr) which is how she always calls me, and when I didn’t go to her right away, still trying to be respectful of her issues, she began to grow agitated, bouncing back and forth between the gap and the window to see why I wasn’t coming to her. Eventually her frustration grew too much for me to bear, so I walked over to the main part of the window and crouched down at my usual spot: a specific panel that has a tiny gap underneath it where Kanzi can smell me. She came right over and slowly began to calm down as I talked quietly to her and kept my hand on the glass for her to inspect. She tried a couple of times to get me to play by jumping away from the window and cocking her neck, but I wouldn’t bite and remained where I was. Finally she just stayed there for a while, alternating between smelling me and looking me in the face. Her eyes grew softer and her tail went straight up; she continued purring quietly and we just stayed like that for a minute or two. 

It was at that point that I suddenly heard a voice hissing in my ear, “Isn’t that exactly what we’re not supposed to do?” It startled me; when I looked around and realized all the other guests in the area had heard this as well, it embarrassed and angered me. I knew, obviously, that it was Pam, finally pried out of her “station” to come and berate me. I took a moment to try to compose myself then slowly stood up. “No, Pam.” I said, “we were asked not to excite her or try to get her running, or deliberately engage with her in that way.” Had Pam been properly observing, she would have easily noted that I had done none of those things and, in fact, had been a calming effect on Kanzi once she had noticed me of her own accord. Then I leaned in closer to Pam and said, very clearly, “Don’t you ever call me out like that again in front of a crowd.” I looked her in the eyes to drive my point home, then left the area. Nancy would have been witness to all of this as well. No matter what Pam thought of my actions, she had no right to act in that manner; making matters worse, she was completely wrong in her conclusions. But I was too angry and humiliated to engage any further at that time, so I moved over to the benches by the Watusi cattle and sat there for a bit, trying to calm down. This proved ineffective so, wishing to avoid any further confrontation, I got up and headed to the Canadian Domain for a couple of hours. When I finally passed by the hyena exhibit again, Pam and Nancy were long gone. To the best of my knowledge, I have not seen her since that day.

Quick note here: none of what I know was asked of us was conjecture; I had had discussions with multiple keepers concerning how to act around Kanzi and everything I did that day was sanctioned by all of them. 

Now, in retrospect I should probably have filed a complaint about Pam before I left the zoo that day, but that isn’t ordinarily my style, nor did I really wish to once again be ignored by education staff, so I simply went home and tried to process the events. A couple of days later, through an email exchange with Heather House, I learned that Pam had obviously taken a different approach and complained about me, although I cannot imagine she related the same story I have written here. When I was told Heather wanted me to come in to discuss my “interactions with animals,” that was absolutely the last straw and I quit my position in a reply to her (and others). 

On my next zoo visit I came to find out that, not content with simply stirring the pot with management, Pam had poisoned the entire well by telling other volunteers her version of events.That is a woeful breach of my privacy and she had absolutely no right to do that.Yet, rather than be reproached for any of this, a week or so later she was awarded the Volunteer of the Year prize; and thenshe went on to garner the same award from CAZA. What an absolute crock.

My last shot ever 

On the visit to the zoo the day I was thrown out and banned, I encountered a new barrier at the hyena enclosure, this time in front of the eastern enclosure where Pam had attacked me. I took a shot of it and posted on my own FB page to only Friends how sometimes being an asshole has farther-reaching effects than perhaps originally intended. Pam was not there; I did not say she was there; I did not mention her name in the body of the post; I have no idea why any of them were still stalking me that day, so I am completely in the dark as to what happened after that. All I know is, in a nutshell: Pam behaved extremely badly in her official capacity as a uniformed volunteer on shift; she went and told a story to management clearly designed to throw me under the bus; she repeated this story to other volunteers; and now not only have I been forced to stay away from Kanziand the other animals I love so dearly for 2 ½ years, but in their proposals they are still trying to protect and coddle Pam. There is nothing even remotely “reasonable” about this, and it has shattered my heart and soul so completely it’s doubtful I will ever be whole again.

This seems a good place to mention that had I any intentions of any sort of revenge on Pam, I would have done it by now. The zoo gave me all of her contact info – including home address – while I volunteered there. So they may not be quite as worried about everyone’s safety as they claim. 

And that’s how we got here. And it’s why I can never accept any proposal that centres on Pam’s wishes.